The regular newsletter is off this week but we couldn’t let this romantic holiday pass without proclaiming our deep and abiding love for ALX in the form of some classic Valentine’s rhymes. We hope you enjoy these extremely stupid expressions of our genuine affection for (and amusement with) this wonderful city we all call home.
Roses are red Violets are blue If you build us a bike lane We’ll probably sue
Roses are red Condos are tall We have too much pizza And Zoning for All
Roses are red Travis loves Taylor Your work doesn’t count Unless there’s a mailer
Roses are red We’re as dense as Madrid And the Witness Tree Knows what you did
Roses are red Some trees are sequoia Bring back integrity Or we’ll file a FOIA
Roses are red You’re not being pranked If you vote for more housing You might just get spanked
Roses are red Despite what year it is Get a condom from Del Everyone has syphilis
Roses are red Yard signs are in fashion Stop the Arena Graphic design is my passion
Roses are red Our Christmas tree’s thick We’re gonna freak out If you paint one more brick
Roses are red Violets are blue The mayor dug a poop tunnel Underneath you
Ok we got things started but we want to hear from you too - post your dumbest funniest best ALX valentines in the comments!
You can follow Becky @beckyhammer.bsky.social and Jesse @oconnell.bsky.social on Bluesky, or you can e-mail us anytime at alxtranewsletter@gmail.com.
Roses are red
Crosswalks are rainbow
They look so good
Until that first snow
Roses are red
Nothing gold can stay
Zoning for Housing, the arena
Who will Save Del Ray?
Roses are red
DASH is kickass
I can get anywhere
Without a bus pass
Roses are red
Alexandria's future is dark
Traffic is jammed
And no place to park
Roses are red
The arena sucks
We'll lose Old Navy, Target
And the Starbucks
I might have gotten carried away.
Roses are red
Is the arena a no-go?
Let’s focus instead
On the ACPS logo