If you’d asked us in November of 2023 what we thought the main topic of conversation in Alexandria would be in the coming year, you’d have barely had the question finished and out of your mouth before we blurted out “HOUSING!” It couldn’t have been more obvious that coming out of the Zoning for Housing conversation we were going to spend a year focused on the implementation and impact of the various ways that we were (or weren’t) bending the curve on the availability and affordability of housing here in the city.
And then in a real Sliding Doors moment for local civic affairs, it turned out that whoops, no, 2024 was actually going to be spent talking about a once-in-a-generation economic development opportunity and all of the thorny concerns and consequences that could come with it, from public financing details, to governing board composition, to traffic impact, to labor relations. We’re the Gwyneth that caught the train—and the events that have followed, the issues we’re concerned about, and the choices before us now, are a result.
But we’re also the Gwyneth that missed the train—our housing issues didn’t go away on December 13. We still need to maximize the tools available to local policymakers to make progress on this key area of cost burden and uncertainty for many city residents. The work on zoning changes was one tool, while the approved housing in existing small area plans is another (and in fact to blur the two timelines and ruin(?) the metaphor for a moment, some of the more compelling aspects of the arena discussion have actually been the analysis showing that the entertainment district proposal could catalyze meaningful new housing construction in Potomac Yard on an accelerated timeline).
A tool that’s gone largely undiscussed, however, is the role played by public housing, a topic very ably covered in Vox about a week and half back. Public housing is a topic that housing advocates are often cautious to put too much focus on because a city’s financial resources to provide it are limited in structural ways, which typically means its impact on overall housing stock is necessarily less than that of market rate development. It can be especially tempting to dismiss it as a solution because wealthy homeowners often use it as a diversion when they want to block new residential projects in their neighborhoods that they don’t like—“We don’t need luxury condos [implied: right here], we need government-funded housing [implied: over there]!” But it’s still a vital element of the housing policy toolbox, and one that can give local leaders a more direct stake in driving the outcomes they’re looking for.
If you haven’t had the chance to read the Vox piece yet, Rachel Cohen walks through a look at what contemporary public housing is and isn’t, and particularly highlights a nearby project in Montgomery County, MD as an example of how local governments can play a major role in the direct creation of quality housing opportunities through the smart leverage of public funds.
It’s a really great piece and we’re glad more attention is being given to this aspect of housing policy that often gets stigmatized and misunderstood through old stereotypes about what we mean when we talk about public housing. And while Alexandria wasn’t cited as an example in her piece, our community is one that has done quite a lot of the kind of policymaking she describes. The Lineage (formerly Ramsey Homes), Sansé and Naja (corner of Mount Vernon and Glebe), The Bloom (Carpenter’s Shelter), and The Waypoint at Fairlington are all recent projects right here in our city that used varying amounts and types of public support. It’s fantastic that city staff and local electeds have been using this tool and using it so effectively, and not only should we lean into more of this but we should also look to better tell the story of why we’re doing it and how it benefits all of us.
We might have been wrong about what the dominant focus of 2024 was going to be, but that doesn’t mean we were wrong to anticipate the different ways we should take the housing conversation—at the end of the day it all ties back to the bigger discussion about how to most effectively use our public resources to become the city we want to be ten, twenty, thirty years from now. Sometimes you miss the train, sometimes you don’t—but no matter what, the choices we make lead us to where we were always supposed to be.
Things You May Have Missed Because You Have a Life
On Valentine’s Day the Washington Post profiled an Alexandrian who started a business growing tulips in her basement. Now that we think about it, it’s actually pretty surprising that more Del Ray residents haven’t turned to in-home agriculture given the neighborhood’s
chronic floodingnatural irrigation system.We made it onto another list! This time Old Town has slid into the coveted #6 spot on a ranking of “America’s best districts for dinner dates,” narrowly edging out Reno, Nevada and… exactly what kind of “dinner date” are we talking about here?
Finally, it’s time to call your mother and tell her that Alexandria is officially the Carb Capital of the National Capital Region.
Local Discourse Power Rankings
Betrayed By Furniture (Last week: NR). Last summer, a lawn chair collapsed when one of us sat down in it [Editor’s note: to be clear, it’s the enormous obviously-not-chair-rated doofus telling this story, not Becky]. And as we sat there, ass on the ground, entombed in a pile of aluminum and vinyl, friends laughing so hard they couldn’t breathe—we couldn’t help but feel utterly betrayed by that chair-shaped lie. In that moment we could not have possibly imagined another piece of furniture selling anyone out so hard… until we read last week about Bill Euille’s filing cabinet straight up wrecking him with its regrettably colored interior, perfectly toned to hide a tell-tale financial document. Let this be a lesson to all of us—be ever vigilant lest your credenza plot to move against you.
Not in My Potomac Yard (Last week: 3). A new economic impact study is out, and its unanswered questions are the thing that will kill the arena. Or maybe labor union opposition is the thing that will kill the arena. No, the transportation plan is the thing that will kill the arena. Yard signs are the thing that will kill the arena. State-level partisan politics are the thing that will kill the arena. People marching in a parade are the thing that will kill the arena. Questions written on index cards are the thing that will– [sound of forehead thunking onto keyboard].
Summer Camps (Last week: 4). There are certain moments in life where it is entirely appropriate to be pumped full of adrenaline, your heart pounding, your every thought directed to a singular moment of focus and determined execution. You’re at the starting line of a huge race, for example, or you’re trying to escape from a tiger enclosure, to offer a second equally plausible example. But what we can all agree is that you should not feel this way trying to register your kid for Rec summer camp—yet there we were on Wednesday morning, finger poised over the mouse button, waiting for the clock to click from 8:59 to 9:00 and then GO GO GO, CLICK THE THING, NO THE OTHER THING, WAIT IS IT IN THE CART? OK IT IS? DID YOU CLICK CHECKOUT?? WELL CLICK IT AGAIN!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DON’T TAKE DISCOVER CARD and honestly this is no way anyone should feel by 9:04 in the morning on a work day. Lord, we still feel like we need a drink and we’ve had days to recover.
WMATAmatic Teller Machine (Last week: 2). Generally speaking, hostage-taking rarely works out great as a tactical maneuver. Just ask Dennis Hopper in Speed, or the guys that took Liam Neeson’s daughter in Taken, or whoever the bad guys were in Man on Fire (were they cartel members?) before Denzel did Denzel things to them. The point is—none of those people ended up getting what they wanted and also lots of stuff blew up. That’s why we’re really not thrilled at the budget shenanigans happening down in Richmond regarding Metro funding, which was absent from the Senate version of the bill. Negotiating is all fine and good and we respect there’s a process at play here—but holding tens of thousands of people’s commutes hostage and threatening the resilience of countless local businesses in Northern Virginia is taking things maybe just a bit too far. Just remember—if you look around and can’t tell who in the room is Willem Dafoe in Speed 2… it’s probably you.
Not-So-Winter Not-So-Wonderland (Last week: NR). It’s going to snow 6 inches on Friday night, they said. Cancel all your plans, they said. When will the Capital Weather Gang be held accountable for their lies??? Of course it wasn’t going to snow! We are on record in the pages of this very publication about the incontrovertible fact that it is now spring. So please explain to us, how did this forecast make any sense? When it’s 50 dang degrees outside and everybody is saying “haha, wow, I can’t believe it’s going to snow tonight!” maybe it’s time to step away from the weather models and remember that we live on a burning planet and our children will never again know the true meaning of winter. Anyway, have a great weekend everybody!
Alexandria’s Hottest Club Is… George Fucking Washington
For a city of curmudgeons who’ve made a professional sport of fighting with each other about all manner of petty shit, we find it remarkable that Alexandrians of all stripes can come together and agree on their love for one singular thing: George No-Middle-Name Washington (1732-1799). We’re obsessed with this fucking guy! He used to hang out here a couple hundred years ago and we’re still not over it. We proudly point out all his old haunts: George Washington’s church, George Washington’s bank, and of course George Washington’s apothecary, or as we like to call it, Ye Olde CVS. We named a school after him and built him an enormous symbolic phallus a handsome memorial. We even march in a parade every year to honor his memory as “Alexandria’s Original Living Legend” (though we’ve, uh, strayed from that mission somewhat). It’s a lot! In fact, we’re gonna go out on a limb and say it’s too much. We’re all aware that he trod these hallowed grounds, we can lay off the commemorative signage. There’s no need for people to pee in the Gadsby’s Tavern bathroom under a plaque that says “George Washington passed a kidney stone here,” it’s excessive and frankly a little weird.
And listen—we all know that George was the first president, but who was this guy really??? Does he deserve all of [gesturing at the entire city kissing framed photos of him on their nightstands every night before going to bed] this? What did he do that was so great? Okay, he “won” the “American revolution.” In the words of Elle Woods: What, like it’s hard? He was tall, but so is Jesse and he’s not all tha-[sound of keyboard being wrestled out of Becky’s hands]. George’s height was certainly a point in his favor, but on the other side of the ledger, his non-military professional record was pretty spotty. Everyone thinks of him as a farmer but he was pretty shit at it, he had to start distilling whiskey in order to make money. Nothing against whiskey (we’re fans) but like, how difficult can it be to breed mules? Just put two of them in the barn together and play some D’Angelo. Having teeth, that’s also something George struggled with. Kind of gross! He hated profanity which is a huge strike against him in our book. He crossed the Delaware River, big deal, so does the New Jersey Turnpike. His refusal to lie about cutting down a cherry tree just tells us he wasn’t quick enough on his feet to think of a good excuse. “The tree was diseased, I was trying to stop it from spreading to the other trees because of my horticulture knowledge” BOOM. Embarrassingly easy. Maybe all of this is why George is only on the lowly one dollar bill. Everyone knows the higher the value of the bill your face is on, the more important you are. Maybe we should consider figuring out what connections Alexandria has to $10,000 bill icon Salmon P. Chase.
On top of all that, George didn’t even live in Alexandria. This man was the original Fake Alexandrian. His house is ten entire miles outside city limits! By 18th century standards that might as well be the surface of the moon. His “residency” here was basically the revolutionary era version of Dr. Oz living in New Jersey and running for a senate seat in Pennsylvania. If John Fetterman were around back then he would have flown a plane trailing a banner that said “HEY GEORGE, WELCOME HOME TO FAIRFAX COUNTY” over Mount Vernon and George would have deserved it.
That said… [standing up and doing a 180-degree spin to face the opposite direction] we will engage in fisticuffs with any other part of the country that tries to claim him. Washington, DC? Not founded until after he died. Washington State? Pretty sure George didn’t even know the west coast existed as a physical place. George Washington National Forest? George was afraid of bears (probably). The George Washington Bridge? A heretofore-unnamed circle of hell George would have avoided at all costs. Washington-on-the-Brazos, Texas? Get that “Neuilly-sur-Seine” shit out of here, this isn’t France. George Washington Motor Lodge in Allentown, Pennsylvania, site of the infamous altercation between pro wrestler Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka and his mistress Nancy Argentino, an event we definitely knew about before reading the “things named after George Washington” page on Wikipedia? It was torn down thirty years ago and the site is now a Home Depot. This is what happens when you try to steal George from us. Not to mention that when you make our man the mascot of your university you are really entering cursed territory.
The point is, he’s ours, for better or for worse. If we’re going to keep defining our municipal identity as the hometown of George Washington despite alllllll the counterarguments laid out above, we should at least use our citywide Founding Father circle jerk as an excuse to better ourselves. As a teenager, our future first president wrote a book of etiquette tips that we think might be most welcome at this juncture in Alexandria public life. The two of us will set an example by committing here, publicly, to follow George’s rules. Well, unless we’re talking about #24 (“Do not laugh too loud or too much at any public spectacle”). Or #88 (“Be not tedious in discourse”). Or—you know what, let’s keep expectations reasonable. After all, George Washington may have been a heroic mythic figure, but the rest of us are only human.
The Alexandria Times Quote of the Week
“The most frequent question I’ve heard regards the timing of the story, and why it took so long to come to the public’s notice. While we answered that question in the final ‘Outcome’ section of the story, I also realize that many people may not have waded through all 6,800 words of the piece.”
Got to admit we can sympathize here, as our official newsletter motto is basically “if you can wade through 3,000 words we promise there are some jokes at the end.”
We Get Letters
The tastefully named Jessie K. writes in response to the Feb 6 issue:
Just a quick note to say YAAASSSS on your topic of keeping an open mind to the arena. I didn’t realize how much people loved a non-descript chronically half-vacant strip mall and the prospect of dozens more identical condos and office buildings filling in Potomac Yard over the next 20 years.
The idea of an awesome town center and music hall sounds like a potentially swell plan, of course with all of the caveats necessary (parking, Target, funding, traffic, crime, metro, all the things).
Anyways, thanks for saying it out loud.
Thanks, Jessie. We’re with you, and we appreciate that even those of us in the eminently reasonable “maybe” column draw a red line at losing the Target.
One Awesome Thing in ALX
Over the past few weeks the city has hosted a packed schedule of events to commemorate Black History Month. It’s been a great opportunity for Alexandrians to learn, celebrate, and find real value in what is without question the worst month of the year meteorologically speaking. The offerings have included museum exhibits, concerts, book discussions, and film screenings–including several activities for kids and families—that the city announced on its website alongside an explainer titled “Why Do We Still Need a Black History Month?” that was obviously written by someone who’s spent a lot of time arguing with racist trolls on Nextdoor.
One of the most exciting events in the lineup was the installation of 11 new signs along the city’s African American Waterfront Heritage Trail. The trail, which is part of the broader 23-mile Alexandria Heritage Trail network, travels along the Old Town waterfront and highlights key locations and events in the history of the city’s African-American community. It was first inaugurated as a “virtual trail” in 2020 (with a south portion added in 2023) that you could follow using your phone. This approach may have scared people off given that the notorious inaccuracy of GPS navigation has created some dangerous situations in the past, from nearly murdering drivers to almost starting a war between Nicaragua and Costa Rica. But now the trail has real physical signs! This welcome upgrade makes the trail more accessible and is less likely to cause an international incident.
The signs cover topics like the domestic slave trade, the impact of retrocession on Black Alexandrians, and the African-Americans who integrated the workforce at the Torpedo Factory (back when it actually made torpedoes). We all know how important it is to continue educating ourselves about the legacy of these events and how they shaped the city we live in today, but honestly, it hits different to learn about that history when you’re standing in the place where it happened instead of just reading about it at home. So the next time the weather is nice—which probably won’t happen in February, because February is THE WORST—consider putting on your walking shoes, heading down to the river, and checking the new signs out.
You can follow Becky @beckyhammer.bsky.social and Jesse @oconnell.bsky.social on Bluesky, or you can e-mail us anytime at alxtranewsletter@gmail.com.